So last week I made a handful of goals.
1) Stop eating when I am full at each meal.
2) Go to the gym everyday.
3) Send away for my British passport and all the work that includes.
4) Work on school at least six days this week and complete a math test.
Okay so here is how I did:
1) Kind of, not every meal. I'm trying to think back and I remember I did some slight over-eating at some points and snacked a little when I shouldn't have but overall I'm pretty happy with what I put in my body this week. Could be better, wasn't bad by a long shot.
2) I went to the gym five out of seven days this week. When I didn't go it was because I was on meds for a savage period and was in no shape to be out of bed let alone at a gym. Otherwise I had some fantastic workouts and will be sharing my progress with that tomorrow.
3) No, I didn't send away for my British passport. I have everything I need to do it now though and intend to fill out all my paperwork and send it out this week.
4) No, and this is the worst one. I got barely any school work done this week. I have a problem with anxiety and I feel like a side effect might be a lack of concentration. I have an appointment with my doctor on Thursday to discuss this. Regardless, I want to get a certain amount of Biology and Math done this week.
I didn't reach all of my goals entirely and maybe I made them a bit stiff but I don't feel so bad about some of them like the eating or the gym, I tried and achieved even if I didn't quite get all the way there.
Goals for this week:
1) Finish the current section of biology I am in and start a new one. Do my math assignment and study and complete the quiz for it.
2) Strive to stop eating when full.
3) Go to the gym six days in the next seven, at least.
4) See my doctor and discuss anxiety.
5) Fill out the paperwork and send away for my British passport.
I am going to do my very best to achieve these this week, I have made them slightly more specific than last week which I think is smart.
I also want to be in the 220's this Saturday weigh-in, but I'm not putting that one on the goal list. It would however make next week's 'hell yeah list'.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
9 Week Plan
New Goal. New big goal which I am determined to rock. Today I was kept in bed with vicious cramps. Because of that, I did a lot of thinking.
Recently I have been thinking about moving to England (I printed off all the necessary forms today and have collected all the documents) but at the same time although I am a dual citizen applying for my passport so I can live and work there, I have never been there!
I was planning on going over having saved up more money and having lost all the weight I need to. Maybe even having had the eventual surgeries I will need to remove the excess skin I have ( and of which there will be much more of by that point). I assumed I would go over with enough money to stay if I wanted to but unsure if I would. I would stay with family and travel for a couple months, look into schools, see family and then decide.
I came up a new idea today. Going over for two weeks in April to see if I like it, visiting family, looking into schools and seeing some sights. I also do have another motive for this that I haven't really talked about yet. I won't lie, it involves a guy. That isn't the main reason but it'll make the trip even more amazing. Then if I decide I want to move I have to start saving all over again.
I can't say for certain I am going to do this, I need to see if I can get an incredibly cheap flight closer to the time (C'mon Air Transat!). However I am going to act as if this is what is going to happen. I have things I need to accomplish if I want to go around the first of April, some that are wants and some that are needs. I will however, again treat these all as needs.
Goals Before Trip To England:
- Save up another 1500 dollars. In two months. With pretty much no employment, that makes this incredibly challenging. But if you think I am above doing everything with the exception of selling my body or becoming a hitman you are so wrong.
-Lose 21 pounds by April 1st. This means losing an average of 2.3 pounds a week over the next nine weeks. I am terrified of hitting a plateau. I haven't hit one yet and I'm positive and paranoid it's coming. It will be challenge at this stage to lose 2.3lbs a week but I will work my ass off, literally. It will bring me to the BMI range, overweight and not obese.
-I have to finish Biology which which will take some hard work but is entirely doable and I want to be almost finished my math course by the time I leave.
Big goals. Worthwhile goals. Huge payoff.
Recently I have been thinking about moving to England (I printed off all the necessary forms today and have collected all the documents) but at the same time although I am a dual citizen applying for my passport so I can live and work there, I have never been there!
I was planning on going over having saved up more money and having lost all the weight I need to. Maybe even having had the eventual surgeries I will need to remove the excess skin I have ( and of which there will be much more of by that point). I assumed I would go over with enough money to stay if I wanted to but unsure if I would. I would stay with family and travel for a couple months, look into schools, see family and then decide.
I came up a new idea today. Going over for two weeks in April to see if I like it, visiting family, looking into schools and seeing some sights. I also do have another motive for this that I haven't really talked about yet. I won't lie, it involves a guy. That isn't the main reason but it'll make the trip even more amazing. Then if I decide I want to move I have to start saving all over again.
I can't say for certain I am going to do this, I need to see if I can get an incredibly cheap flight closer to the time (C'mon Air Transat!). However I am going to act as if this is what is going to happen. I have things I need to accomplish if I want to go around the first of April, some that are wants and some that are needs. I will however, again treat these all as needs.
Goals Before Trip To England:
- Save up another 1500 dollars. In two months. With pretty much no employment, that makes this incredibly challenging. But if you think I am above doing everything with the exception of selling my body or becoming a hitman you are so wrong.
-Lose 21 pounds by April 1st. This means losing an average of 2.3 pounds a week over the next nine weeks. I am terrified of hitting a plateau. I haven't hit one yet and I'm positive and paranoid it's coming. It will be challenge at this stage to lose 2.3lbs a week but I will work my ass off, literally. It will bring me to the BMI range, overweight and not obese.
-I have to finish Biology which which will take some hard work but is entirely doable and I want to be almost finished my math course by the time I leave.
Big goals. Worthwhile goals. Huge payoff.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Just Do It
“Just Do It”. Nike had something with that one. 'Just do it' is when you don't want to, don't feel like it, can think of a thousand excuses why not, and still do it. It's essentially forcing yourself to do it. Maybe not even thinking about what your about to do, or at least not dwelling on it, so you don't have time to make up reasons why not.
This has been incredibly instrumental in the fitness component of my weight loss. From the beginning to the now this has been true. The first time I ever went to the gym I looked inside the windows and knew I was going to be the largest person there. I would most definitely be sweating the most whilst being able to physically do the least. I was insecure and terribly embarrassed, but I bit my cheek and Just Did It.
When I have grown frustrated with the pace of my weight loss, when I have grown tired of the monotony of going everyday, when I was sore or tired or PMSing, I just did it. I have never regretted that. But typically you don't regret GOING to the gym do you? 90% of the times I haven't gone I have regretted it.
Because of this I have transformed so much about my body. Not just the way I look or how much I weigh but how I feel. Before at the age of 19 I had high blood pressure, at 20 it's fantastic. I LIKE to move now, I like to twirl and dance and get up and move around. I like to walk. I workout almost everyday. The world has changed because I have changed. I look at it less as being full of obstacles and more full of things I can do. The sentiment of 'Just Do It' has changed me.
What I have been trying to do recently and really want to do is take that same sentiment and use it towards eating. When I am full but there is still more delicious food on my plate and I know I shouldn't eat anymore, when I know I shouldn't be picking before dinner, when I know I should just say no. I need to 'Just Do It'. I need to not dwell on it, not think about how good it would taste or feel or how it would be just another few bites. I need to say no and I need to walk away. I need to Just Do It.
This has been incredibly instrumental in the fitness component of my weight loss. From the beginning to the now this has been true. The first time I ever went to the gym I looked inside the windows and knew I was going to be the largest person there. I would most definitely be sweating the most whilst being able to physically do the least. I was insecure and terribly embarrassed, but I bit my cheek and Just Did It.
When I have grown frustrated with the pace of my weight loss, when I have grown tired of the monotony of going everyday, when I was sore or tired or PMSing, I just did it. I have never regretted that. But typically you don't regret GOING to the gym do you? 90% of the times I haven't gone I have regretted it.
Because of this I have transformed so much about my body. Not just the way I look or how much I weigh but how I feel. Before at the age of 19 I had high blood pressure, at 20 it's fantastic. I LIKE to move now, I like to twirl and dance and get up and move around. I like to walk. I workout almost everyday. The world has changed because I have changed. I look at it less as being full of obstacles and more full of things I can do. The sentiment of 'Just Do It' has changed me.
What I have been trying to do recently and really want to do is take that same sentiment and use it towards eating. When I am full but there is still more delicious food on my plate and I know I shouldn't eat anymore, when I know I shouldn't be picking before dinner, when I know I should just say no. I need to 'Just Do It'. I need to not dwell on it, not think about how good it would taste or feel or how it would be just another few bites. I need to say no and I need to walk away. I need to Just Do It.
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Back from Vancouver,
Today I got back from four days staying in Vancouver. I went down because I had a dermatology appointment, I had to wait quite a while for it and I saw a fantastic doctor. With that said, it wasn't fantastic news. I was diagnosed with something that leaves small pale white blotches on my skin. There is nothing that really gets rid of them, more will appear but it is purely cosmetic. On the one hand I am disappointed (RE: Choked that I workout in part to change my appearance and it's being deformed against my will) but on the other I think I need to strive for the grace to remember it is only superficial.
So that wasn't the best news and I'm still struggling with that. Something else I found difficult in the almost five days away was eating. I had some small weight loss triumphs and many more falls I need to learn from.
What I did right: I worked out everyday I was coming, going and there except for one. All of my breakfasts were positive choices, all reasonable in calories and nutrition. Clocked a fair amount of walking hours. Ran my first mile without stopping.
What I did wrong: Oh man, I ate way too much. I ate lots of white carbs and cheese and so many delicious things. Indian food and Japanese food and Mexican food galore. I didn't stop eating most of the time when I was full (disappointing). I snacked when I wasn't hungry.
Maybe I feel like I am not quite as far ahead as I thought I was. I have so much to learn. I will learn it though. I think it's practice. I need to force myself to make the right choices with stopping eating when I'm full. I need to do it again and again until it becomes second nature. Right now it still feels forced, but again, I will get there.
Goals for the next week:
1) Stop eating when I am full at each meal.
2) Go to the gym everyday.
3) Send away for my British passport and all the work that includes.
4) Work on school at least six days this week and complete a math test.
I'm excited to get back on track. This isn't a diet, if It was I would have fallen off the past four days. This is my life and all there is, is forever. I'm happy to be home and I'm looking forward to accomplishing these things this week. Let's see how it goes!
So that wasn't the best news and I'm still struggling with that. Something else I found difficult in the almost five days away was eating. I had some small weight loss triumphs and many more falls I need to learn from.
What I did right: I worked out everyday I was coming, going and there except for one. All of my breakfasts were positive choices, all reasonable in calories and nutrition. Clocked a fair amount of walking hours. Ran my first mile without stopping.
What I did wrong: Oh man, I ate way too much. I ate lots of white carbs and cheese and so many delicious things. Indian food and Japanese food and Mexican food galore. I didn't stop eating most of the time when I was full (disappointing). I snacked when I wasn't hungry.
Maybe I feel like I am not quite as far ahead as I thought I was. I have so much to learn. I will learn it though. I think it's practice. I need to force myself to make the right choices with stopping eating when I'm full. I need to do it again and again until it becomes second nature. Right now it still feels forced, but again, I will get there.
Goals for the next week:
1) Stop eating when I am full at each meal.
2) Go to the gym everyday.
3) Send away for my British passport and all the work that includes.
4) Work on school at least six days this week and complete a math test.
I'm excited to get back on track. This isn't a diet, if It was I would have fallen off the past four days. This is my life and all there is, is forever. I'm happy to be home and I'm looking forward to accomplishing these things this week. Let's see how it goes!
Monday, January 16, 2012
Don't know what I'm doing, Only why I'm doing it
I don't know how to do this. I really don't know how to blog.
Often I had thought of making one before and had made a half hearted attempt at it in the past but it never amounted to anything. Or I made one and I didn't lose any weight. I suppose why I didn't start a blog at the beginning of this weight loss journey was because I really didn't believe I was going to lose the weight.
Over a month ago I started reading a blog called 'A merry life'. I was hooked instantly, I went back several years and read all of her posts. I could relate to so much of it, she got it, she was living it, had lived it. I didn't think of it at first then I started considering attempting the same thing. Not the same sort necessarily other than the fact they are weight loss blogs. I'm not a professional writer or blogger and I really don't expect very many people to read this.
When I decided to create this blog I had lost almost 100lbs. I felt at a point where I knew I wouldn't quit. I wanted to document the rest of my journey in something other than pictures. I wanted to express what I was going through. And maybe someone, eventually, could read my jumbled words and in someway relate to them.
Even still, I didn't really know how. I created this blog and I just sort of started talking. I still have so many questions about it, Should my posts be more focused? How much of my life outside of weight loss should I speak about? Should I post pictures? Ones with my face? How do I improve? It goes on and on.
I don't know how to do this, I don't know what I'm doing, but I know why I want to do this. Because of that the beginning of this blog feels a lot like the beginning of my weight loss.
Often I had thought of making one before and had made a half hearted attempt at it in the past but it never amounted to anything. Or I made one and I didn't lose any weight. I suppose why I didn't start a blog at the beginning of this weight loss journey was because I really didn't believe I was going to lose the weight.
Over a month ago I started reading a blog called 'A merry life'. I was hooked instantly, I went back several years and read all of her posts. I could relate to so much of it, she got it, she was living it, had lived it. I didn't think of it at first then I started considering attempting the same thing. Not the same sort necessarily other than the fact they are weight loss blogs. I'm not a professional writer or blogger and I really don't expect very many people to read this.
When I decided to create this blog I had lost almost 100lbs. I felt at a point where I knew I wouldn't quit. I wanted to document the rest of my journey in something other than pictures. I wanted to express what I was going through. And maybe someone, eventually, could read my jumbled words and in someway relate to them.
Even still, I didn't really know how. I created this blog and I just sort of started talking. I still have so many questions about it, Should my posts be more focused? How much of my life outside of weight loss should I speak about? Should I post pictures? Ones with my face? How do I improve? It goes on and on.
I don't know how to do this, I don't know what I'm doing, but I know why I want to do this. Because of that the beginning of this blog feels a lot like the beginning of my weight loss.
Sunday, January 15, 2012
Overall happy
I am still excited from weighing-in yesterday. 36Lbs to ONDERLAND baby. When I started losing weight I couldn't fathom being at all close to the 100's. Now? I can almost see it in the distance.
I went over somewhat on my calories today, I couldn't really estimate the calories in dinner but it definitely wasn't the rest of my daily allowance, but I also don't think it was tragically over either. I went to the gym and had a great workout. A typical workout for me right now if I have time is:
-35 minutes on the elliptical
-12 minutes on the treadmill (half running and half power walking)
-Alternating days of two or three either upper body or lower body machines
-36 crunches.
I'm hoping to soon bump it up to three minutes running and two minutes walking and immediately I'm going to be adding more crunches. On the elliptical I have my incline at a 12 and my resistance at an 11. If I don't have time often my workout is just the elliptical, but I so badly want to be a runner so I need to work on that.
With four and a half days of eating out beginning on Tuesday I'm not entirely sure how to deal with it. I know I can't eat three meals out and stay within my daily caloric allowance. My current theory is to try and make half decent choices, to workout and swim everyday and to stop eating when I'm full up. Hopefully, HOPEFULLY that will be enough to maintain. But, I'm still worried about it.
I am not doing enough school work, I sort of came to the conclusion today that I'm not doing it because I don't feel that I will ever accomplish it. I am really, truly going to try to take my strategy for weight loss to school work.
With that said, I feel happy. It's almost a year since I started losing weight and trying to change my life. And I'm just happy. Stressed sometimes, irritable others, emotional occasionally but overall happy.
I went over somewhat on my calories today, I couldn't really estimate the calories in dinner but it definitely wasn't the rest of my daily allowance, but I also don't think it was tragically over either. I went to the gym and had a great workout. A typical workout for me right now if I have time is:
-35 minutes on the elliptical
-12 minutes on the treadmill (half running and half power walking)
-Alternating days of two or three either upper body or lower body machines
-36 crunches.
I'm hoping to soon bump it up to three minutes running and two minutes walking and immediately I'm going to be adding more crunches. On the elliptical I have my incline at a 12 and my resistance at an 11. If I don't have time often my workout is just the elliptical, but I so badly want to be a runner so I need to work on that.
With four and a half days of eating out beginning on Tuesday I'm not entirely sure how to deal with it. I know I can't eat three meals out and stay within my daily caloric allowance. My current theory is to try and make half decent choices, to workout and swim everyday and to stop eating when I'm full up. Hopefully, HOPEFULLY that will be enough to maintain. But, I'm still worried about it.
I am not doing enough school work, I sort of came to the conclusion today that I'm not doing it because I don't feel that I will ever accomplish it. I am really, truly going to try to take my strategy for weight loss to school work.
With that said, I feel happy. It's almost a year since I started losing weight and trying to change my life. And I'm just happy. Stressed sometimes, irritable others, emotional occasionally but overall happy.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Saturday Weigh-In # 2
Previous Weight : 241.8lbs
Current Weight: 236lbs
Weight lost this week: -5.8lbs
Goal for February 4th: 229 and below.
It's hard to know how to react to this weight. I think maybe last week with my minor gain my body was still reacting to being sick and adjusting afterward. I think in part (hopefully) this is just my body playing catch up. Also this week I counted calories. Never exactly, but always a running rough total in my brain. I tried to have it between fifteen hundred and two thousand calories. I also pretty much always stopped eating when I was full. I think I am most proud of that.
This week I am heading to Vancouver for four days for a doctors appointment and a mini vacation. I leave on Tuesday and I am coming back on Saturday. I really want to have a great time, but I also don't want to throw out all my eating habits whilst I'm there. That is four and a half days of eating out. I'm going to try to make the best choices I can for wherever we eat and most importantly, stop eating when I am full. Beyond that, I am going to try to workout before I leave on Tuesday and I know there is a gym at the hotel so I need to commit to workouts everyday there as well. Plus a few laps in the pool, which I'm excited about.
I am in the 230's. I am a happy girl. I can almost taste the 220's. I don't think I'll weigh myself this coming Saturday just because I know I will ingest a lot more sodium than I usually do and won't have an accurate reading. The following Saturday I will probably be on my period and because I don't weigh myself at that time of the month, my next weigh-in is in three weeks on the 4th of February. My goal for February the 4th is to be in the 220's. I would be seriously happy with 229. It's going to be hard not weighing in but I think it's a smart choice, we'll see if I can abstain from the scale.
Current Weight: 236lbs
Weight lost this week: -5.8lbs
Goal for February 4th: 229 and below.
It's hard to know how to react to this weight. I think maybe last week with my minor gain my body was still reacting to being sick and adjusting afterward. I think in part (hopefully) this is just my body playing catch up. Also this week I counted calories. Never exactly, but always a running rough total in my brain. I tried to have it between fifteen hundred and two thousand calories. I also pretty much always stopped eating when I was full. I think I am most proud of that.
This week I am heading to Vancouver for four days for a doctors appointment and a mini vacation. I leave on Tuesday and I am coming back on Saturday. I really want to have a great time, but I also don't want to throw out all my eating habits whilst I'm there. That is four and a half days of eating out. I'm going to try to make the best choices I can for wherever we eat and most importantly, stop eating when I am full. Beyond that, I am going to try to workout before I leave on Tuesday and I know there is a gym at the hotel so I need to commit to workouts everyday there as well. Plus a few laps in the pool, which I'm excited about.
I am in the 230's. I am a happy girl. I can almost taste the 220's. I don't think I'll weigh myself this coming Saturday just because I know I will ingest a lot more sodium than I usually do and won't have an accurate reading. The following Saturday I will probably be on my period and because I don't weigh myself at that time of the month, my next weigh-in is in three weeks on the 4th of February. My goal for February the 4th is to be in the 220's. I would be seriously happy with 229. It's going to be hard not weighing in but I think it's a smart choice, we'll see if I can abstain from the scale.
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